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I've Found My Cure!
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May 16, 2012 5:35 pm
148 Views
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Just when I had just about given up hope of ever finding something to cure my not at all rare malady, it finally was approved by the USDA. 150 million Americans should be cheering right now. 
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5
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You're a Pinhead!
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May 16, 2012 5:29 pm
141 Views
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Anyone who does this is literally and figuratively a huge PINHEAD! I'd try acupuncture, but not to that degree. 
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4
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That's So Deep!
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May 16, 2012 4:03 am
210 Views
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I've never seen a fortune cookie that touched me on so deep of a level. 
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8
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Be Very Specific
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May 15, 2012 5:00 pm
238 Views
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Or else you will get what you asked for in a slightly skewed way. He's delivering what you asked for. 
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5
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That Doesn't Count
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May 15, 2012 4:17 pm
251 Views
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That definitely doesn't count as cleaning off your windows. I'm glad I don't live there! 
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8
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Camping Tip #2
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May 14, 2012 3:54 am
413 Views
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Like a good Boy Scout, be prepared! Don't forget to pack your favorite supplies. 
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12
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That Would Bring Me Around
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May 13, 2012 9:42 am
507 Views
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I don't have a Corvette, but if they wanted to wake me from a coma, selling my most valued possession would probably do it. 
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8
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